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10강 - 05
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10강 - 05
I had a close friend who was married without children. One day she confessed to me that she didn't know if she was ready for children. "Heather, I'm just not sure that I'm up for it." "Even for someone as capable as you, parenting seems extremely demanding." I responded, "Yes, having kids is life-changing and presents its new challenges, but it's not as bad as people let on; for every one thing my kids do bad, they do nine things that light up my life." "Really?" "It is a little surprising given the social media status updates I receive from you." I was obviously surprised to hear this revelation from one of my closest friends. So, later that day, I wanted to prove it was unwarranted. I pulled up the last several weeks of updates. There it was staring back at me in black and white; my friend was exactly right! While my kids were the greatest joy in my life, you would never know it from reading my updates. My kids provided 90 percent of all the new wonders and happiness in my life, yet I was conveying the exact opposite in my status updates. For every one positive status update about my kids, "Lilly gives the best hugs" or "I posted Will's beautiful finger painting on the fridge," I'd post nine negative ones, "Have a massive headache from the kids' nonstop screaming" or "Not sure I can handle a full day at the zoo with the kids again." The reality of the situation shocked me, and I was afraid that there was a possibility that I was also projecting this negative attitude onto the kids. The answer to this came sooner than expected. For the next few weeks, I made a concerted effort not to post anything remotely negative on the social media platforms I used. Then one day, about two weeks into practicing this experience, it really hit home when my four-year-old tugged at my shirt and said, "Mommy, you seem a lot more happy, and I really like it."
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1 I had a close friend who was married without children. 2 One day she confessed to me that she didn't know if she was ready for children. 3 "Heather, I'm just not sure that I'm up for it." 4 "Even for someone as capable as you, parenting seems extremely demanding." 5 I responded, "Yes, having kids is life-changing and presents its new challenges, but it's not as bad as people let on; for every one thing my kids do bad, they do nine things that light up my life." 6 "Really?" 7 "It is a little surprising given the social media status updates I receive from you." 8 I was obviously surprised to hear this revelation from one of my closest friends. 9 So, later that day, I wanted to prove it was unwarranted. 10 I pulled up the last several weeks of updates. 11 There it was staring back at me in black and white; my friend was exactly right! 12 While my kids were the greatest joy in my life, you would never know it from reading my updates. 13 My kids provided 90 percent of all the new wonders and happiness in my life, yet I was conveying the exact opposite in my status updates. 14 For every one positive status update about my kids, "Lilly gives the best hugs" or "I posted Will's beautiful finger painting on the fridge," I'd post nine negative ones, "Have a massive headache from the kids' nonstop screaming" or "Not sure I can handle a full day at the zoo with the kids again." 15 The reality of the situation shocked me, and I was afraid that there was a possibility that I was also projecting this negative attitude onto the kids. 16 The answer to this came sooner than expected. 17 For the next few weeks, I made a concerted effort not to post anything remotely negative on the social media platforms I used. 18 Then one day, about two weeks into practicing this experience, it really hit home when my four-year-old tugged at my shirt and said, "Mommy, you seem a lot more happy, and I really like it."